Kenja's Newsletter & Updates

Hello again everybody

Welcome to another edition of Kenja's Newsletter & Updates.

The votes are in from last issue on the Summer Schedule... and I am still receiving mail on that topic. Thank you everyone for writing in with your opinions. *smile*

Summer Schedule for Newsletter:

OK then, here is the schedule for the newsletter this summer. Newsletter will be sent out in the first week for each month, starting with this month of June, July and August. That actually means that I have decided sending the newsletter out only once a monthly rather than every three weeks. The first week in September will then kick off the regular schedule once again at every two weeks.

Thank you so much everyone for your support and understanding. Hopefully you will be pleased with the results, as this is not a vacation for me but rather a time to catch up, create new things and see some of my plans come reality.

* NOTE* I use Zip Magic to compress Stationery and/or Desktop Theme files into EXE format. If you ever get a password prompt during installation... ignore it and proceed. They are not password protected! For more installation help visit either the Stationery Help or the Theme Help sections.

If you need Java Scripts, don't forget to visit the Steal My Java Scripts section, where you can choose from 23 of the most popular Scripts, test them on the site and then copy & paste them into your own homepage(s).

Visit the Native American Music Shop for great Native American Music selections.

For great gift items visit Kenja's Gift Shop. Gift categories include Fine Jewellery, Gardening Decor, Crystal, Clocks, Brass, Sculptures and so much more. Now with a time-limited Discount of 40% on all items!

Only Aquatics is one of those sites created for a business, but they also offer a free program for people who maintain a fish aquarium and/or are thinking about getting an aquarium. The program is free, however is a whopping 9.5 MB to download and 17.5 MB installed. Though I suppose that since the program is freeware, and information of this sort usually runs quite a bit of money, it might just be worth it.

ACROPHONOLOGY is an interesting site that will let you find out the meaning of your name and/or that of your pet(s), in form of energy levels. I found it quite accurate, especially what it said about my cat. The site also offers a free Astrology chart, Bio Rhythms, Weather Forecast for Spring 2000 and various other stuff along those lines. *smile*

ZDNet offers a free useful service called Update your PC. When visiting the site it will install a small program, scan your system for all installed programs and then give you a list of updated drivers and programs with direct download links. Of course you do not have to download everything on that list, but you might want to stay updated with drivers. This is a great service and best of all it is free.

Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Taster Named FRANK, who was visiting Texas:

Recently I was honored to be selected as an outstanding "Famous Celebrity" in Texas, to be a judge at a chili cook-off, because no one else wanted to do it. Also the original person called in sick at the last moment, and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came.

I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted.

Here are the score cards from the event:

Chili # 1: Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili
JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
FRANK: Holy smokes, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway with it. Took me two beers to put the flames out. Hope that's the worst one. These hicks are crazy.

Chili # 2: Arthur's Afterburner Chili
JUDGE ONE: Smoky (barbecue?) with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.
JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
FRANK: Keep this out of reach of children! I'm not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. Shoved my way to the front of the beer line.

Chili # 3: Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili
JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans.
JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of red peppers.
FRANK: This has got to be a joke. Call the EPA, I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now and got out of my way so I could make it to the beer wagon. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest.

Chili # 4: Bubba's Black Magic
JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Sally, the bar maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills so I wouldn't have to dash over to see her.

Chili # 5: Linda's Legal Lip Remover
JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef; could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
FRANK: My ears are ringing, and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed hurt when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. Sort of irritates me that one of the other judges asked me to stop screaming.

Chili # 6: Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice and peppers.
JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous flames. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except Sally.

Chili # 7: Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili
JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef threw in canned chili peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried about Judge Number 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress.
FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth and pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel it. I've lost the sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My clothes are covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth at some point. Good! At autopsy they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful, and I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air I'll just suck it in through the 4 inch hole in my stomach.

Chili # 8: Helen's Mount Saint Chili
JUDGE ONE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced chili, neither mild nor hot. Sorry to say that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 fell and pulled the chili pot on top of himself.
FRANK: --------------
(editor's note: Judge #3 was unable to report).

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Copyright © 2000-2001 Kenja's Newsletter & Updates   ISSN: 1530-700X    All Rights Reserved.
Content written & edited by A. Way aka Kenja. The opinions expressed herein are my own. The reproduction and/or unauthorized use of any parts of this Newsletter, it's content and/or graphics is strictly forbidden.